Truth is not always enlightening and persuasive.
Truth about ourselves often appears to be
revulsive rather than conducive to our well-being.
Although there are usually lies inside kind words,
we enjoy them much better than truth！
Don’t you know that one kind word can change
someone’s entire day？
Most people hate to look at the dark side of
their minds. They don’t like truth as much as
they like kind words！
「讚許」並不一定是屬於正面的行為，
因為「讚許」未必一定是純粹的稱讚或鼓勵，
「讚許」之中往往包含「做假」和「虛偽」，
而這樣的「讚許」亦容易令弱智者成為 slave of praise。
有時「讚許」甚至成為諂媚的工具。
When your friends begin to flatter you
on how young you look,
it’s a sure sign you’re getting old.
( Mark Twain )
Beware of direct and indirect praises;
they may come with falsehoods and hypocrisy.
Embrace critiques as well as criticisms;
they may contain a grain of truth.
( Jason Ling )
同樣，「批評」並不一定是屬於負面的行為，
因為「批評」之中往往亦可能有「真」和「誠」。
If people would dare to speak to one another unreservedly,
there would be a good deal less sorrow in the world
a hundred years hence.
( Samuel Butler )
You cannot find peace of mind in society
by avoiding thinking as well as criticism.
( Jason Ling )
Few people have the wisdom to prefer
the criticism that would do them good,
to the praise that deceives them.
( Francois de La Rochefoucauld )
然而道貌岸然的人卻告訴我們：
If any communication is claimed to be authentic,
it should not include criticism of any kind.
言下之意就是人與人之間的溝通，
和哲學家、思考家及做學問的人之間的溝通，絕對不相同。
由於大部份人都是平庸者，人與人之間的溝通要有一點虛偽，
任何批評和批判都不能夠接受，
因為必須照顧平庸者的面子，所以只可以讚，不可以彈！
關於「批評」，思想家提醒我們：
There is only one way to avoid criticism:
do nothing, say nothing, and be nothing.
( Elbert Green Hubbard )
那麼我們應該如何看待「批評」呢？
其實不論是「批評」還是「批判」，
首先當然是看「批評」或「批判」的內容是否合理，
可惜不少人的做法是先去揣摩對方的目的。
至於「批評」的內容，往往取決於批評者的級數，
而這個所謂級數，當然是指學習態度和實際的功夫，
和輩份、文憑、學位未必有關係。
名校的博士學位，不一定是 24K 金漆招牌。
批評者可能擁有鑑賞力，但他們不一定能夠說出一個道理，
因為有鑑賞力的人「知道」的東西，可能比他能夠說出的多許多；
批評者亦可能心懷惡意，但這不是問題的重點，
因為聰明的批評者往往指出我們的疏忽大意的地方。
他們其實都是我們的「貴人」！
The true critic …
is the man who becomes your personal enemy
on the sole provocation of a bad performance,
and will only be appeased by good performances.
( George bernard Shaw, 1890 )
面對批評，正確的態度當然是「有則改之，無則加勉」，
即使對方智慧較低，亦不要忘記「愚者千慮，或有一得」，
如果對方批評得好，有智慧的人會感謝對方細膩的觀察，
因為自己在某個角度未必能夠看得這麼清晰。
至於愚昧無知的「批評」，當然一笑置之，
但千萬不要和愚蠢人辯論，因為會浪費自己的時間，
而時間就是生命，除非你的目的是借助愚蠢人來教導旁觀者。